My Ideal Parenting Model

When Mom and Dad Share It All is a New York Times cov­er story on gender and par­ent­ing. A great story with great­er insights, this para­graph sums up how I hope my future would be:

They would cre­ate their own mod­el, one in which they were par­ent­ing part­ners. Equals and peers. They would work equal hours, spend equal time with their chil­dren, take equal respons­ib­il­ity for their home. Neither would be the keep­er of the men­tal to-do lists; neither of their careers would take pre­ced­ence. Both would be equally likely to plan a birth­day party or know that the car needs oil or miss work for a sick child or remem­ber (without prompt­ing) to stop at the store for diapers and milk. They under­stood that this would mean recal­ib­rat­ing their career ambi­tions, and prob­ably their income.

It doesn’t sound easy, and in real­ity it’s harder again.

1 thought on “My Ideal Parenting Model

  1. Cedar

    Part of the reas­on I think this is going too far is that it ignores any pre-exist­ing dif­fer­ences in per­son­al­ity and interest between part­ners.
    My wife and I have 3 small chil­dren (5 year old twins and a 2 year old daugh­ter) and we share a great deal of the par­ent­ing. When I was in gradu­ate school, we would almost tag team, where I went in morn­ings, and she worked after­noons, or days of the week. But it made more sense for me to do some things and her to do some things (she enjoys cook­ing, for example, my dad was a con­tract­or so I have oth­er skills).
    The couples in the Times all spent so much track­ing their tasks that it just seemed to me to sap the trust and respect for each other’s dif­fer­ences.

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